photo by porcupiny
I have been completely and utterly unmotivated as of late. Nothing can push me to do what needs to be done. I have absolutely no desire to finish projects I started a while back, I totally lack the commitment to update and manage this blog, and I don’t feel like learning how to use my new camera that’s now 2 years old and collecting dust next to the TV I no longer watch. All I want to do is hang out with my kid, go on long walks, and cook good food. Which is exactly what I have been doing this past month, but now it’s almost February and I’m starting to feel like a loser. Perhaps it’s because I’m not working or in school and I just feel like I’m missing something in my life, but I’m not missing anything. I’m enjoying spending time with the little dude and being in the moment. Enjoying doing nothing. Enjoying cooking and eating good food. Enjoying going on long walks and taking in the sights of my neighborhood.
But then that fucking little Asian half of me is saying that I need to get off my goddamn lazy ass and accomplish something great. Go back to grad school, get a job, publish a children’s book, write a cookbook, promote the hell out of my blog, make a shit load of money, and buy a nice car that can comfortably fit a car seat.
Anyway, that little Asian half of me told me to make a list of goals I want to accomplish this year. I’m not calling them resolutions because I equate that term with failure, plus I despise the word “resolution.” It’s totally overused, especially around this time of the year, and reminds me of people who wear GAP clothes, love Jennifer Aniston, and eat at generic chain restaurants. BLAH.
In no particular order, these are my 2012 goals.
1. Clean the slate — deal with any remaining issues I may have with friends or family.
2. Finish writing a children’s book.
3. Begin writing a cookbook.
4. Attach new lens to camera and actually use it rather than always taking crappy pictures on my iPhone.
5. Use Photoshop to edit my pictures.
6. Upload quality photos to my blog.
7. Blog consistently (at least twice a week).
8. Get back to my pre-pregnancy weight by March 10th.
9. Get into shape by June 10th.
10. Go camping at least 3 times this year.
11. Go hiking at least once a month.
12. Take a road trip up north to visit family and friends.
13. Be a little nicer to my husband by giving him more compliments and less criticisms.
14. Spend less money on unnecessary crap, especially for people who don’t appreciate it.